Quick story of why I was meant to become an Artist.
Throughout my life I have always had what I would call an “Overactive Imagination”. Meaning that no matter what situation I am in, regardless of time or place, my mind is consistently moving at an extremely high rate. Images flashing from one to the next in a split second. Thoughts and ideas flowing so fast, it’s as if I just was not meant to have a clear mind.
Even during my meditation sessions I find myself constantly fabricating these false realities. Memories that don’t exist. Situations that have never happened or never will happen. Creating characters, imagining sounds and smells, and even placing myself in the eyes of others. These thought processes have become something that I had to FIGHT very hard to cope with.
In school and most doctors would call it ADHD. I was diagnosed with it at a fairly young age. I was always told that ADHD was the reason for my inability to sit still and pay attention in class. It wasn’t until my 25th year of life that I looked back and realized that, I was the special kid in the back of the class that was allowed special treatment because of my “Diagnoses”. I was prescribed that legal form of methamphetamine known back then as “Stratera” and was told to take one every day. All it did was numb my mind and fuel my inner RAGE! The insanely fast thought processes did stop. However, they were merely replaced with angry, emotionally driven daydreams where all I could think about was how bad I didn’t want these pills. Funny to think about now.
As I left the public school system at the age of sixteen and started to go out and have my own experiences in the real world, I learned so much more about my so called “ADHD”. I learned that not only did I NOT have anything wrong with me. I also learned that neither did ANYBODY ELSE. I learned that my thought process and the hard hard work of my “Overactive Imagination” was not some disease or condition that I have no other choice but to deal with. It was but a skill. A skill that I could apply to all aspects of MY reality. Everywhere that I go. Everyone that I meet.
I first started to study this process when I was in Arizona Project challenge. A 6 month military style program for teens. I remember that was where I first heard the term ” Attention to detail”. The military, no matter branch or program, has a very strong implementation on the skill that is simply PAYING ATTENTION. I was pretty damn good at it. I could use this skill to place myself in the heads of the others around me. I found that by applying this “Overactive Imagination” I was able to learn things much faster than I was while I was in school getting special treatment. That was when I realized that I DID NOT HAVE ADHD. Actually what I was, and still am to this day, what is called a Kinetic Learner.
A Kinetic Learner learns through experience. Through holding things, through physical movement, hands on training, and their sense of touch or awareness. These people are often mislabeled as inattentive or constantly distracted. When in all actuality it is the complete opposite. Us Kinetic Learners, or “victims of the ADHD”, are easily bored by things that we do not experience ourselves. We find that more than ONE thing at any given time can be fascinating. We watch, we listen, we are very aware of our surroundings because EVERYTHING AROUND US IS INTRIGUING. Just because we may seem distracted. Don’t for one minute think that a Kinetic Learner is not still soaking up the information. They are. They just don’t have to look at you to do it.
I bring this point into the light simply because, after learning that about myself. I changed and I began learning MY WAY. I simply went out and did shit! I watch people, I read books and immediately apply what I read, I walk in front of people and imagine that I’m seeing myself through their eyes, and I study reactions. Once I began to get bored with learning, (which does happen sometimes), I discovered sound.
Through the beautiful art that is SOUND I found that I could apply all of my collective knowledge to one sound. Everything that I have learned about people, our society, and the way our HUMAN minds work can be applied and turned into sounds. As humans we have 5 senses. There are aspects of all five of these senses that can have a deeply emotional impact on an individual.
Smells can spark a memory that you never imagined you would recall.
Sight can mesmerize us and control what we believe.
Taste can bring happiness to the taster in an almost therapeutic way.
Touch can send shivers down your spine and connect you physically.
Sound, sound can completely control your entire body. Sound is a force that cannot be seen but can most definitely be felt. Through the adjustment of one Wavetable position or one Oscilator on a synthesizer I can completely control an individuals movement. I can control their emotions, as well as, their thought process. That mixed with visuals and you can make a break a person. This is why I have chosen the path that I have.
Throughout all of my experiences. Sound and it’s ability to manipulate has been one thing that has harnessed the full potential of my “Overactive Imagination”. Calming it and most importantly, controlling it.